Null & Void Expertise

Every where I turn, there is someone professing to be some type of relationship “expert”. You have the  The Sex Experts, The Relationship Experts, The Marriage Experts, et. al.

Is there an ‘expert’ committee that goes around labeling people experts? Sometimes I feel that half of the time no one has labeled these people ‘experts’ but themselves. Sure, it looks good on a bio, CV or a website, but does any truth ring true to their ‘expertise’?

The “experts” that I truly find amusing are the ones who label themselves “Relationship Experts”. Why is it that these people are usually the ones who are single and haven’t had a decent relationship since Methuselah? What could anyone possibly learn from someone like that?

I vote that some of these “Relationship Experts” should call themselves something a little more apropos, “The Break-Up Expert” has a pretty good ring to it. Because damn, if they’re not in a relationship and they’re dishing advice, then I can only think the only thing they’re good at is breaking-up?

Correct me if I’m wrong?

Let’s not forget to mention the “SeXperts” (sex experts).

Now, truly the only person who I think fits into this category, and rightfully so, is Dr. Ruth.

Look at how old she is! She has to be pushing 100 by now, right? (just kidding)

She’s been having sex for a long ass time and has written about it for decades! But nowadays, you have people writing about sex, and guess what, chances are, they’re not having any. So in my mind, the only thing they’re an expert at is probably masturbation. So lets give a round of applause for “Masturbation Experts” because at least they’re practicing safe sex!

What also amuses me is that as soon as someone jumps into a new relationship, they’re now the ones willing to dish advice.  When weeks before, they were known as a “Man Bashing Expert”.

B*tch please.

Why would I want to take advice from anyone who’s willing to accept the first man who’s willing to offer them an iota of attention? Nah, I’m good. I’ll pass. It’s all the same book, just a different cover, if you ask me, as I look at my watch and see how long the relationship will last. One week, two weeks, three weeks, it’s over & now they’re back to their original expertise of  man bashing.

For now on, I’m going to call myself :

The “I Don’t Need An Expert Dishing Me Advice When They’re Only An Expert In Their Own Mind” Expert!

Tags: are people really seeking advice from you?, breaking up, did you just pay 19.95 for your expertise badge?, fungkeblakchik, men, people who call themselves experts, relationship experts, sex experts, women, you ain't no expert